LOOKING FOR ANSWER

What can I do about the harsh and hurtful things my husband says to me?
We can appreciate the frustration and pain you have experienced as a result of your husband's hurtful words. ... Remember that God loves you, and you are important in His sight.

LOOKING FOR ANSWER

We're believers and attend church, but when my husband gets angry he sometimes hits me. What should I do?
We are sorry to learn of your unhappy marital situation. Let us assure you that God does not intend for anyone to be treated abusively.

LOOKING FOR ANSWER

Would it be all right to marry if my boyfriend promises to change and control his temper?
Marriage is a serious decision. Above all, you need to seek God's will. You would be wise to be cautious.

LOOKING FOR ANSWER

How can I overcome the effects of the abuse I suffered as a child?
Abuse is one of the most traumatic and frightening experiences that can happen to a child. Yet God can provide a healing of memories and the power to overcome and live victoriously in His grace.

MY ANSWER

I have a very hard time believing that God loves me because my own father was abusive. How can I believe in God's love?
Billy Graham writes, "Parents may not love us as they should—but God does. We know it because Jesus Christ was willing to die for us."

MY ANSWER

Recently, a church-going man in our community was convicted for molesting his daughters. How could something like this happen?
Billy Graham writes, "This man allowed himself to be controlled by his own sinful desires and impulses. In other words, he never turned away from things he knew were wrong, but allowed them to control him."

MY ANSWER

I can't ever forgive my father for physical and emotional abuse and leaving my mother.
Billy Graham writes, "Your father's sin has produced a tragic harvest of anger and bitterness in your soul, and they're like a poison that will only make you miserable if you don't get rid of them."

MY ANSWER

I have a friend on my high school soccer team whose father was abusive. She has a hard time relating to God as a loving father.
Billy Graham writes, "Pray for your friend, that God will help her overcome her fears and doubts. In addition, ask God to help you explain to her that God isn't like her father, or like anyone else who might have hurt her."

MY ANSWER

My father has been rude and verbally abusive all his life. I believe in honoring our parents, but I've had enough.
Billy Graham writes, "Pray for your father, that he will realize his spiritual poverty and open his heart and life to Jesus Christ. Pray also ... that you will show Christ's love to him."

MY ANSWER

My parents warned me not to marry my fiance. Now he's divorced me and I can't bring myself to face them. What should I do?
Billy Graham writes, "Don't let your pride, or anything else, keep you from making contact with your parents. You need their support right now, and hopefully they'll be wise enough to give it to you."

MY ANSWER

Last week, someone found a new baby in an abandoned car in our city, apparently left to die. How could anyone do this to a helpless child?
Billy Graham writes, "Situations like this are tragic, and I have no doubt that they break the heart of God. Any type of child abuse is wrong in God's eyes, and what happened to this infant is abuse of the worst kind."

MY ANSWER

My rehab program wants us to write to people we've hurt and apologize to them. But the only people I've hurt are ones who hurt me first.
Billy Graham writes, "In my experience, it's almost impossible to sincerely apologize to someone or ask them to forgive us, if we aren't also willing to forgive them."

MY ANSWER

I know I need to stay away from drugs and alcohol, but beyond that, how can I reform myself?
Billy Graham writes, "The most important step you can take is to turn to Christ and seek His help as you face the future."

MY ANSWER

Why do some people never seem to learn from their mistakes? I have a friend who got into a really abusive relationship with someone last year, and now she's about to fall into the same situation with someone else. I've tried to talk to her, but she just doesn't get it.
As you're discovering, one of life's most frustrating experiences is to try to help someone who is headed toward almost certain disaster - and then have them ignore you.

MY ANSWER

I'd like to think God loves us (which you often say in your column), but how can I really know? I didn't grow up in a very loving home, and I've always struggled with the feeling I wasn't worthy of God's love.

MY ANSWER

How can God give children to people and then let them abuse them? I don't understand how anyone could do this, but whenever I read about child abuse I always ask myself why God did it. Is it wrong for me to question God?
No, it's not necessarily wrong to question God -- not if we're sincerely seeking answers.

MY ANSWER

I wish someone had warned me about how dangerous our words can be. My mother and I had harsh words over something she did about six months ago, and we haven't spoken since. She's stubborn and I know she'll never apologize, but I still wish I'd just held my tongue.
The question you face is this: Will you let this situation go on indefinitely - or will you take steps to overcome it?

DECISION MAGAZINE

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Shaun Shmyr has had a life of pain, but nothing robs him of his joy in Christ.

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Never Left or Forsaken
For someone with a horrific childhood experience, can Someone who calls Himself our Father ever be trusted?