My Answer

My sister is carrying on an affair with a married man in our community, and I think everyone here knows it, including the man's wife. I tell her that what she's doing is wrong but she just laughs and says she doesn't care. How can I get through to her? — Mrs. D.K.

One of the most devastating effects of sin is that it often blinds us to its consequences. Almost every person who gets entangled in a sin like this thinks they will get by with it, and that there won't be any consequences to their actions.

But they are wrong. The Bible's warning couldn't be clearer: "You may be sure that your sin will find you out" (Numbers 32:23). Right now, all your sister can think of is what is happening to her right now—and Satan is very good at deceiving her into thinking it will continue forever. The Bible says that there is pleasure in sin—for a season (see Hebrews 11:25).

But somewhere down the road it all will come crashing down on her. I don't know when or how—but it will happen. The Bible warns, "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction" (Galatians 6:7-8).

What can you do? First, pray for your sister. Only God can break through the hard shell around her heart, and only God can convict her of her sin and bring her to repentance and faith in Christ. Then ask God to help you warn her of the consequences, lovingly and yet firmly. Above all, point her to Christ, for only He can forgive her and cleanse her, and only He can put her feet on a new path—the path that leads to eternal life.

 

3 Comments

Stephanie says 10.25.2011, 07:12 a.m.

I am in a similar dilemma where I have been in an affair with a married man for almost 1 year 7 months. I am born-again and I know it is wrong. I have been trying to end it but I find it is hard for me to do so. I know that I will suffer the consequences of this.God is a just God and I know that if I walk in His ways He will bless me with a godly husband, which has been my desire for a very long time. I love this man so much but I need to get out of love with him and start my life afresh. I am desperate and I know I cannot do it alone. I need help.

Nancy says 8.26.2011, 03:45 a.m.

Thank you for this advice about adultery and the key bible verses for this situation. My sister's 10 year affair ended, but she still thinks it was God's will for her to be with him. Now she is newly engaged and vows to never tell her new boyfriend about being a mistress, and has told all of us in the family not to say a word to him. This breaks my heart, and I feel like cautioning this poor man, instead of seeing them head into the path of a destructive marriage based on her deceitfulness.

Cathy says 7.5.2010, 8:42 p.m.

Thank you for this. I have a new friend who confided in me that he has a wife and a girlfriend who his wife knows about too. I pray that God will help him. The other women needs it too.

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