My Answer

My husband unexpectedly died in his sleep six months ago, and we didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. I don't think I'll ever get over it. I know we'll meet again in heaven but that doesn't seem to help me right now. Can you help me? — Mrs. K.R.

One of the hardest experiences any of us will ever face in life is losing someone we dearly love—and I know it's especially hard when death comes unexpectedly and we have no opportunity to say a final goodbye.

Perhaps the most important thing I can say to you is that God loves you and understands what you're going through. When Jesus stood by the tomb of His friend Lazarus, He knew that shortly He would bring Lazarus back to life—but the Bible still says that "Jesus wept" (John 11:35). This is the shortest verse in the Bible, but it reveals a great truth about Christ's compassion for those who grieve. The Bible says, "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail" (Lamentations 3:22).

You will always remember your husband, and your grief over his death won't go away quickly. But in time, your pain will lessen—and God wants to help you in this process. What can you do? First, take time each day to thank God for the years you had together. Thankfulness is like a healing balm to our souls.

Then ask God to help you reach out to others who are grieving. They need your encouragement—and you need theirs. Most of all, don't carry your burden alone but hand it over to Christ. The Bible says, "Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall" (Psalm 55:22).

 

10 Comments

pearl says 1.28.2013, 2:57 p.m.

my husband died just a little over a month on christmas day,he was 53,my heart is just broken .i feel like i will never be happy ever again,he was my best friend ever.

Nirmala says 1.13.2013, 5:39 p.m.

My husband of 23 years suddenly died a month ago at age 50, I still can't understand what lesson I am supposed to learn from this. I have not harmed anybody why am I being punished, I really wonder if there is a god. I have so much pain, I am scared.

Teresa says 12.31.2012, 00:27 a.m.

I lost my husband on November 27 2012 and i feel a big part of me died that day aswell what keeps me going is my 3 children and my 3 grandbabies we were raising he was only 36 and he went into a coma while he was sleeping and never woke up

Sue says 12.25.2012, 5:48 p.m.

My husband of 34 years died Nov 19, unexpected and the hurt is unbearable.

Charlene says 10.14.2012, 09:46 a.m.

Lost my soulmate of 42 years 3months ago , still feel very alone with excruciating pain in my heart

Naaz says 9.19.2012, 08:45 a.m.

My husband also died in his sleep 4weeks ago. He was only 47. Only thing keeps me going are my 2 daughters.

Cloe says 4.25.2012, 2:31 p.m.

I have been having a terrible time with missing my husband. I agree with Tammy that I have died inside and going on each day is so hard. I know I will never truly be happy again.

Dee says 4.9.2012, 9:59 p.m.

I lost my soul mate a month ago we were together for 8 years he passed away in his sleep now it seems like my heart is broken I just don't want to go on but I know I need to what has helped I started going to Calvary chapel

Abby says 1.15.2012, 8:23 p.m.

Tammy, my heart goes out to you. I experienced 2 devastating losses this year and feel exactly as you do. My hope of Heaven in the time God chooses for me is my only dream now. May God bless you and help you through this anguish.

Tammy says 5.31.2011, 5:05 p.m.

I lost my husband in his sleep,he was 41,its only been two weeks and I feel I died inside when he died.for me there is no life without dwane in it,theres nothing that will make me happy ever again.

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