BGEA: Our niece is very thin, but thinks she is too fat. How can someone deceive herself so much?

We're very concerned about my niece because she's gotten very thin and eats almost nothing. The reason is, she thinks she's too fat—which isn't at all true. How can someone deceive herself so much? — Mrs. N.D.

You are right to be worried about your niece. I'm not a physician or psychiatrist, of course, but from what you say, it sounds as if she has a very serious eating disorder—so serious that it could be fatal if she doesn't get help. Her parents need to get medical help for her without delay.

Simply urging your niece to eat, or just telling her she isn't fat probably won't solve her problem. No, her idea about herself is not logical—but deep-seated emotional problems seldom are. In other words, her failure to eat properly is really a symptom of a much deeper emotional problem—and she'll probably need help to deal with it. Your doctor or pastor should know what resources are available in her community to help her.

Pray for your niece, and do all you can to let her know you love her. Down inside, she apparently hates the way she is (or the way she thinks she is)—but you don't hate her, and she needs to know that.

More than that, God loves her, and He doesn't want to see her harm herself. God loves her so much that Christ was willing to go to the cross and die for her. The Bible says, "This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us" (1 John 3:16). When she understands this truth, it will help put her on the road to recovery.

2 Comments

Susan says 10.16.2010, 2:43 p.m.

I too have been battling anorexia for at least 40 years. It is a constant battle I have even been to a treatment center only to step off the plane and be greeted by oh my you could almost be a sumu wrestler this after weighing 82 lbs and then at 115 at 5'2" of course that was 6 weeks of intense therapy down the toilet so to speak! I know how Denise feels, my walk with God has defintely gotten so strong over the past 5 years sins of the flesh yes I know and the thing is I do not do this for vainty reasons at all, but from the tapes recorded from "love ones" since the age of 5 of you are too fat, no one will ever love you, if they do it is because you are fat and jolly -oh my Lord now I am right back with the same members of family due to loss of income -you talk about a battle-lets just say that I am in constant communication with God 24 hours a day-Love is the key Acceptance, this is like being in a bottomless pit-not too mention an eating disorder has to be the Most Misunderstood Sickness Disease there is among the public! May God grant us all peace of mind and I thank Him everyday for his sacrafice and for Knowing my Heart where no one else see or wants to see it!

Denise says 10.15.2010, 8:08 p.m.

Well i too have been suffering from anorexia on and off for yrs. All I can say is I always condemn myself, because our bodies are suppose to be the TEMPLE of God. How can one defile the Temple?I am in my 40's and what I have come to realize is that there was never the uncondiontial Love from people that were suppose to love me, there was always, the oh I cannot look at you at such and such a weight! Or the guilt they try to lay on me, of what I am doing to THEM!I think the Love has to first start with loving yourself, then it is possible to understand the love God has for you. For me I know what the Bible says on things in my life, and I battle Bible verses everyday in my head. It's a struggle that I wonder, will I every be free?