Decision Magazine

God’s Purpose in Our Suffering

June 22, 2010 - Sufferers want to be ministered to by people who have suffered. They are suspicious of people who appear to live lives of ease.

God’s Purpose in Our Suffering

This is why Jesus suffered on earth in every way that we do. First Peter 2:21 says, “To this [suffering] you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps” (NIV).

If we are going to emulate our Savior, we have to identify with the people to whom we take His Good News. Christ took on our likeness and subjected Himself to the suffering that plagues us. I don’t advocate that we look for suffering—life brings enough of it on its own—but suffering is an important prerequisite to ministering to hurting people.

Pain Is God’s Plan

When I was 5 years old my mother called me into her bedroom and told me that my hero, the man whom I wanted to grow up to be like, was never coming back to live with us.

She was talking about my dad.

I thought, But he promised me that he would teach me to fly. How could he leave?

Mom said that he had gone to live with Jesus. I knew that was something we all looked forward to, but I couldn’t understand why Dad left us behind.

My father, a missionary pilot, was one of five missionaries killed when they tried to reach out to the Waodani Indian tribe in Ecuador in 1956. The death of the five missionaries and the amazing change in the Waodani after Aunt Rachel (my dad’s sister) and Elisabeth Elliot (the widow of Dad’s friend Jim Elliot) were invited into the tribe to teach them God’s “carvings” is now a well-known story.

Countless lives have felt this impact; thousands of missionaries name the story as the reason their hearts were moved to respond to God’s call. Our family has been blessed by the love and kinship of the Waodani people. Mincaye, one of the men who killed my father, is now the man my children call Grandfather. All of this was God’s plan.

A lot of people believe that when bad things happen, God merely allows them. But God didn’t merely tolerate my dad’s death, and I don’t think He turned away when it was happening. In His sovereignty, He was orchestrating events for His glory and ultimately for our good. This was a hard realization for me, but then I read Acts 2:22-23: Men of Israel, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles, wonders and signs, which God did among you through him, as you yourselves know. This man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross (NIV).

If God could plan the death of His own righteous Son, why couldn’t He bring about the death of my dad?

Another Part of the Plan

My wife, Ginny, and I had three boys. Then we finally had a little girl, Stephenie, whom I made promise me that she’d never grow up. She broke her promise and went away to college. Then Youth for Christ asked Stephenie, who played the piano and bass guitar, to travel with one of their groups for a year, sharing the Gospel around the world.

It was a tough year. I wanted my daughter home, because I knew that some day she would probably meet a boy and go off to get married. She was tall and slim and, in my eyes, beautiful. She was Ginny’s bosom friend. She was our baby.

Finally, the year was over and she was coming home to Orlando. Ginny and I met her at the airport. Grandfather Mincaye was there, too. He was jumping around, big holes in his earlobes, wearing a feather headdress.

Stephenie arrived and we headed out for a welcome home party with the whole family.

Later, I passed Stephenie in the hallway of our home, and she just leaned on me and said, “Pop, I love you.” I thought that my life would never be more complete than it was right then.

A while later, Ginny said, “Steve, Stephenie’s back in her room and says her head is really hurting. Let’s go back and be with her.” So we ditched everyone else and went back. Ginny sat on the bed and held Stephenie, and I put my arms around those two girls whom I loved with all my heart, and I started praying.

While I was praying, Stephenie’s body tensed and she let out a little yelp of pain. Her eyes rolled back into her head. We called 911. The medics rushed her to the hospital. I rode in the ambulance while Ginny, Mincaye and our son Jaime followed us in the car.

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Grandfather Mincaye didn’t understand why strangers had rushed into the house and hurried off with Stephenie. Then he saw her at the hospital, lying on a gurney with a tube down her throat and needles in her arm. He grabbed me and said, “Who did this to her?”

I didn’t know what to say. “I don’t know, Mincaye. Nobody is doing this.”

He grabbed me again and said, “Don’t you see?”

No, I didn’t see. My heart was absolutely tearing apart; I didn’t know what was happening.

Mincaye said, “I see it well. Don’t you see? God Himself is doing this.” He started reaching out to all the people in the emergency room, saying, “People, people, don’t you see? God, loving Stephenie, He’s taking her to live with Him.”

“Look at me,” he said. “I’m an old man; pretty soon I’m going to die, too, and I’m going there. Please, please, won’t you follow God’s trail, too? Coming to God’s place, Stephenie and I will be waiting there to welcome you.”

Finally the doctor determined that Stephenie had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage. She had no hope of recovery. This was the time to either lose my faith or to show the God who gave His only Son to die for my sin that I love and trust Him.

As my daughter died, I watched the plan unfold. My sweet wife, too, accepted this as God’s will and plan. Sometimes Christians have an idea that if we do what God wants us to do, then He owes it to us to take suffering away. I don’t believe that anymore.

I believe that in His sovereign will, He brought this to pass.

Seeing God’s Heart

In the years before Stephenie died, people had started asking me to speak. I began to realize that there was a deficiency in my heart: I could not see the world the way God does.

“I can’t keep doing this,” I told Ginny. “I’m speaking to people from my head, and it doesn’t work. I can’t speak unless I feel the passion of this.”

So I started praying, “God, please let me have your heart for the hurting world. I see it, and I empathize a little bit, but I don’t have a passion for it.” I had no idea if God would give me such a passion or how He would do it, but I begged God to let me see His heart.

Oh, be careful what you pray for. Through the loss of my daughter, God did change my heart. He broke it. He shredded it. In the process He helped me see what He sees. From God’s perspective, just as I was separated from Stephenie, our loving heavenly Father, the God and Creator of the universe, is being separated every day from those He desperately loves. And He will never be reunited with them again if they die without knowing Christ.

I don’t know what role God has for you, but I know He has a role. His great passion is expressed in His Great Commission, and He has given it to messy, wimpy people like you and me. He has made us His ambassadors of reconciliation, and suffering gives us credibility with a hurting world and demonstrates God’s sufficiency to meet our needs.

©2006 Desiring God; article appeared in the March 2009 edition of Decision magazine

 

18 Comments

lue says 4.2.2013, 4:07 p.m.

This article has shed some light on why my dear brother,who loved God with all of his heart (he was my pastor) suffered in his body greatly and died. He wanted so badly to live and to preach to the suffering. Not GOD plan.

Candi says 7.15.2012, 06:29 a.m.

I just want to say how much I love the Graham family. I'm 57 yrs old. Found Jesus at the age of 13. There are still many things I don't understand about the Bible but listening to Preacher Graham helped me to understand God's word much better.

mer says 5.10.2012, 10:34 a.m.

Our pains and sufferings ring us closer to God. It is only in Him that we find comfort and peace. this is his process to strengthen our trust and faith in Him. we can always depend on Him to lift us up in times of need and trials.

joyz says 3.10.2012, 04:17 a.m.

Praise God for this comfort words of u.

JACK says 2.14.2012, 2:31 p.m.

Given today's challenges with Sanctity of Life and Sanctity of Marriage, this message is worthy of further discussion. Thank you.

Jane says 2.10.2012, 11:38 p.m.

Trust god through thick and thin. He is always there to comfort us .

sam says 2.10.2012, 9:24 p.m.

how horrible for you and your family for God to take your only girl from you. Just so that you and your family can suffer and share with others in their suffering.

Nikki says 10.5.2011, 11:40 a.m.

Thank you for this. I have been through an enormous amount in recent years and been pretty sick. I couldn't understand it at all at first and was pretty angry. But now, through it all I see that God has been creating a place in me whereby I can say "God is enough for me". God is sufficient. Also, I now know what it's like to be very sick and that has grown deep compassion in my heart towards people who are sick. I've prayed for years for compassion and to understand what God's love really means. God's love has met me in the depths of sickness and despair. He is my all in all.

Esther Dilawar says 8.16.2011, 04:50 a.m.

I will share this with my friends and really that was God's plan that I reached to this page and read this. I have been praying to become a mother as its been delayed for almost 2 years but now I believe that God must have some plan that HE will fulfull on His right time. I thank God that HE gave me courage on the time when my mother went to Christ . God bless you

Paula says 8.15.2010, 6:15 p.m.

I knew from the time Johannah was two that she had a terminal disease. Her baby brother had cystic fibrosis and when we read the symtoms we knew she had it too. They were so heathy for so many years then when Johannah turned 13 the lung infections started. Still between IV antibiotics she led a full and somewhat normal life. She graduated high school and college. All the while losing her health. Johannah was the bravest person I've ever met. she hated her disease but said it's in my DNA~it's who I am. I would be a different person without it. She never once blamed God or thought that God had "given" her the disease. Sin brought disease into the world not God. I do understand in both your Father's case and you daughter's the Lord could very well have taken them for His glory. I also believe that many times disease, drunk drivers, murderers etc. take people's lives and God has nothing to do with those deaths. I think that people who are hurting need to know that God doesn't take everyones life. Sometimes other do. Either way absent from the body~present with the Lord!

Luke says 7.26.2010, 11:38 a.m.

Thanks for this story... I too have been suffering and in pain. This is a helpful reminder to put all our trust in God and see what our roles in His plan really are...

Amber says 7.25.2010, 00:55 a.m.

Thank you for this story. I am grasping for a reason for my suffering. I now understand that there is a purpose for this. I ask Lord, that you stay with me, cover me with your grace and help me to hold on tight while we take this road together. Thank you Lord. God Bless You for your testimonies Steve Saint and Billy Graham!

serly says 7.15.2010, 8:48 p.m.

Finally I understand what God wants in my life....He wants that I don't lose the faith in Him...Thank 4 the story above that keep me stronger......GOD BLESS

Wambui says 7.7.2010, 08:33 a.m.

How difficult! I often wonder why God instituted pain. I will never understand, all I know is that He comforts and gives us grace to walk through pain. Yes, we can't mask and pretend all is well with Him when in pain.

margaret says 7.5.2010, 09:24 a.m.

I was searching for answers for my pain this morning. I finally found this, thank you so much. I needed this reminder that I am not alone in pain and suffering. That behind it all is a plan for our lives that these things can be used for good. Thank you Lord Jesus for sending this note of encouragement.

Patty says 7.4.2010, 11:00 p.m.

I believe with all my heart that we need to suffer in order to help the suffering people of the world. A person can not relate to another if they have not walked in their footsteps. Jesus walked in our footsteps and understood us completely. And because of that we trust in him completely

Ann says 7.1.2010, 11:46 p.m.

Lord, let the world that sees me see you.

Lord, let us see Your Heart says 6.30.2010, 10:48 p.m.

I hope to share this that in times of pain, we have Jesus. He is our Shepherd indeed. Our Comforter, our Rock. Remembering our dear friend's loss...

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